a mothers work

A mother's work is never done. There is always something that there wasn't time to do, or something you wish you could have done better. This, after a little more than two years, is something I have come to realise. I have developed habits that I never thought I would have, said things I swore I never would say and done things I never expected to do.

I seem to be unable to completely switch off in bed unless I have had a quick tidy up before hitting the sack. The house isnt by any means spotless, but waking up to a relatively clean kitchen feels very important somehow. Dirty dishes either quickly done, or thrown in the dishwasher, and bottles for Lily sorted. At least. I like it extra much if I can muster the energy to make sure dining chairs are properly pushed in. I think I am slowly turning into  a bit of a neatfreak. Strange really. Never had much pride in keeping things tidy when I was younger- my bedroom was a disaster area, clothes strewn, tea mugs all over,  a bit of make-up on the carpet...y'know, usuals. Maybe this is what is know as growing up?

If it isnt a case of trying to keep a step ahead of the cleaning, its trying to plan ahead for the next few days; what activities to do, when to do them, who to see, where to go. Will I really feel like going for that long walk after dropping Maia off? No. Bugger that. Its christmas soon and I'll gorge on food then, so the fitness and weightloss can wait 'til after. No rush, squishy is better than bony after all. Thats what Mark says. He's the husband so I guess he knows what he' on about. He's the one that has to look me lol.

But what about dinner? Oh god, I hate cooking. Wonder what it would be like have  personal chef? oooh then they could do superhealthy food too! Two birds , one stone? Ideal. Birds... poor things, need to put one of those balls out for them, dont want them to starve. Its so cold!? Blimmin cold & snow. So pretty and fun to play in. Hate driving in it tho. Great, not gettin out much into town then.
I can find myself  tossing and turning, thinking about the world and his neighbour, as you can tell. It's amazing what random things that can pop up in my head in those fleeting moments of between awake and almost asleep. Perhaps I shall take pen and paper to bed and jot things down. Doesn't the theory go that you can then forget about the thoughts and blissfully drift off to sleep...?

Its not as simple as only being mum between waking and going to bed for the night, and that is becoming so much more obvious now being  a mother of two. I wouldnt say its twice the amount of work, but craves a bit more forward planning and organising that I just didnt feel the need for when we just had Maia. Life is full of revelations at the moment.

But these two cherubs certainly makes it all worth it <3